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Screw this.

Have I ever told a story here?

Are my posts really helpful to anyone who reads this?

Am I providing any real insight?

What am I trying to prove now?

Proofs in geometry were my favorite because they mimic life. Pretend you're the answer.

I wanted to enable others to see my process. I needed to practice verbalizing my thoughts. I'd lost my ability to hear myself think.

It's a shame that the truth as we individually recall it never fails to hurt someone else who's framed it differently, burnt or buried it for themselves. I'm not being haughty here. I need to say that for every person I've resented in print or cursive, hated aloud or in silence, I've forgiven them first.

Now that I have nothing but heartache for failed relationships, I know I need to focus my energy on equilateral respect for myself and appreciate with my words (this is action) all who have contributed, shaped, influenced, pushed, persuaded, poked and/or prodded me into my chrysalis.

I was scared. I was all I was. I hurt. I hurt. I kill myself every single day I misstep.

Back to the beginning. Like Super Mario.

And "I don't want to speak to hear my own voice" is a lie because I hear it now. It's really me.

"You're never going to make it out of this alive" is the biggest lie ever told. Maybe not. We die when we need to make a return. You'll be yourself elsewhere; yourself is all you'll know until you can be yourself as someone else here again...then maybe you can really become YOU. The you you're meant to be.

That's what I read. Your fate depends on your ability to transform. Grow wings. Literally? I read it's man's duty to balance Earth with Heaven.

Relating to scenarios from songs, movies, novels...watching the news, trying to make sense of it all in and out of context...looking outside-in, feeling inside-out. It's all so necessary.